Anger is an odd emotion. A quick google tells us it owes its existence to our very basic fight or flight mechanism, and there exists a near infinite number of well-researched, hugely funded, experts-in-white-coat-ed studies of it; hell, even Disney’s had a go at explaining it! It burns and rages, explodes, erupts, and seethes; and this week it has been very much in evidence on the Homestead. Yes, it’s pretty safe to say it’s been one of those weeks.
Sometimes it’s worked in our favour, providing the fuel for The Goat Herd and Milk Maid to manhandle the south side chaos into some form of order
and other times the result has been the opposite and it’s ended in rants, tears, and a great big heaping helping of a loss of dignity (nod to another bunch of misfits). It’s first thing in the morning, while six people attempt to locate their breakfast and off-Homestead lunch requirements in the jumble of shelves, dressers and drawer units that make up our temporary kitchen that it really rears its ugly head
and even the animals have been subjected to the odd harsh word as we go about our daily doings.
Thankfully, we have identified the cause and the antidote was administered last night in the form of good, ol’ fashioned sausages, spuds, coleslaw, cauliflower cheese with fruit sponge for afters and accompanied by loud, raucous, table-thumping, belly-laughing, full-on dialogue. We’re all feeling much better now, thank you.
This all-round disgruntlement is what happens when the world intervenes and communication is reduced to snatched conversations in the Homestead mobile enroute another engagement, or in that moment, last thing at night, when we wish each other goodnight before stumbling bedwards. When our irks and piques aren’t able to be aired and examined along with the triumphs, disasters, and hilarious happenings of our everyday life, we Homesteaders tend to go a little doolally.
Although rapt to welcome representatives of the family formally known as the Spanish Division (watch out Staffordshire!), their arrival heralds the confrontation of some very tough issues regarding The Elders. It’s hard not to boil and churn over the waste, injustice, and mind-bending of dementia, but giving it voice helps you make peace with this new reality we’re all facing.
The ability to flick our written word through the ether is a wonder, but it can also be ambiguous and clumsy. A string of such communications regarding our very own Farm Girl and her perceived social requirement shortfalls had us individually raging with indignation and feeling a tad besieged. It took only a few moments of table talk for reason to reassert itself. So what if we’re choosy about who we let into our lives? We take pride in being who we are, marching to our own tune- with a little help from our select group of wonderful friends.
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Sage Words sent by a wise woman when things were looking bleak.
There were other bits of grit in our cosy oyster this week, too, like a dysfunctional bike, a “lost” item or two, and fateful double bookings, but pearl production has now commenced, the sun is beginning to peek over the horizon, and the world is looking rosy again.
No longer is that bad mood rising.
Union Homestead 
So sorry that you have had ‘one of those weeks’. I am very impressed that you managed to get it sorted out, a good meal can be very useful, and I love the quote, so wise!
The quote was just what we needed to hear, right when we needed to hear it.
Oh don’t we recognize this all. I love the idea of grit in the cozy oyster …that can be big things and small things and together they create foul moods and ugly snarling. Dementia is cruel..nothing needs to be said more than that! But a lost book and a kitchen in upheaval can feel twice as irritating in ‘those weeks’. I remember once, in one those weeks, loosing my temper big time when someone honked his horn to me in a parking lot to ‘hurry up’ when I tried to get a moody, squirmy toddler in a car seat with 4 straps in the pouring rain….now I will always stay polite in public but all of a sudden my toddler was in his seat, I tapped the fellow’s car window and when he pulled it down I gave a lecture of at least 20 minutes, explaining very loudly how negative people like him ruined it for the rest…after 15 minutes I passed the ‘stone in the water circles’ and reached world wars and famine all starting with his honking! He was pale as a sheet and I went home invigorated with a happy toddler. ha, grit had come to pearl!
And all of you are the finest of apples, and I love apples! Please, never become a second rate banana! The world deserves Union Homestead Apples!!! xo Johanna
I would have liked to have witnessed your parking lot rant which is so very true…negativity spreads like water circles.
Thanks so much for your lovely comment; we are once again very proud to add our form of diversity to the great fruit salad of life. Have a wonderful weekend x
Phew, I am glad that it got worked out. It sounds quite explosive if it had been bottled up any longer. Luckily I am a little ray of sunshine myself and this sort of thing is foreign to my nature. Also I am retired and the children have long left home which helps in one way. Though I have noticed that those around me get tetchy from time to time for inexplicable reasons.
Indeed, we are honoured to have the attention of such an ebullient gent. As for those periodically tetchy folk around you: what’s THEIR problem 🙂
That’s what I think.
I am so sorry you’ve had a bad week but pleased you’ve managed to sort things out now. It isn’t surprising that tempers got frayed when you think of the problems you are facing. You all seem such sensible, practical, lovely people that these bad times won’t ever last long, I’m sure. I understand the ‘besieged’ feeling only too well. My younger daughter suffers from acute anxiety and for many years now we have been at the mercy of all sorts of people and their advice – some well meant, some not so. It was thought she had autism or Asberger’s Syndrome for a while but she hasn’t; it’s anxiety. We have lost a number of people we thought were friends but we have found strength and support from others. I also know the unhappiness you must be experiencing because of the Bean Counter’s parents’ health problems. I worked for a few years with people with dementia, memory loss and Alzheimer’s and got to know them and their carers and families very well. You are in my prayers.
Thank you so much for your lovely comment. Anxiety is one of those things that many people just don’t understand and I can imagine the type of “helpful” advice you would be subjected to. When it’s all done and dusted, though, you do end up with the cream of the crop as your friends. Have a lovely weekend x
Very true! I hope you have a lovely weekend too x
I’m seeing this a few days late, been away, and just catching up. Sounds like a heck of a week. There’s a certain therapeutic quality to anger… I love the story of the rant to the impatient driver, I too would love to have been a witness. I’ve had one of those goes myself, many many years ago, at a military colleague while we were dealing with recruits doing their gas mask training. I don’t even remember what triggered it, I just remember how good it felt to really let fly, I think for about 10 minutes :).
I love the quote. I guess we all fall into the trap of wanting to be an apple sometimes, and it might be hardest for teenagers, who are trying to figure out if they’re even fruit in the first place. Or something – sometimes it’s possible to take an analogy too far 🙂
I think the kitchen reno would make anyone’s temper fray a bit, and when you start adding in all the other friction points, not least of them being the stress and strain of caring for BC’s parents, I say it’s a good thing there’s such a thing in this world as comfort food. And tea.
Your week makes me think of Judith Viorst’s story for children, made famous by the recent movie, but much better than the movie albeit a tad 70’s ish – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GOGv3Cptb7I You probably know it. Right up till he died a few years ago, my Dad used to use the catch phrase “I think I want to move to Australia” as code to let me know that life was not going well for him that day. I guess he must have read the book to us more than a few times :).
This week will be better, I’m sure.
I was much better at ranting in my younger days; so good in fact that I must have been very tiresome to be around at times 🙂 Now I tend to forget my very pertinent fact half way through the rant and either have to fumble verbally onwards attempting to stumble upon it again or swallow my pride and ask the rantee. My family love it!
Hooray for Alexander!
And you’re right; this week is much much better already 🙂